This time in a child's life is full of mystery and intrigue, battles and emotion, discovery and independence. Despite the numerous "helpful" advice, books on parenting, and somewhat relevant articles that try to broach this subject, most fall a little short in truely capturing what a Mother goes through. Here are just a few things that I've come to realize:
1. You should never refuse a toddler a bandaid. Period. They may shove their grubby little finger in your face and say "here, see!?" and no matter how hard you strain to see a cut, you see nothing. But to them a bandaid is a cure-all. It magically makes them forget any problems in their little world and makes life rosy again. And be generous with them, load up your cupboard with all kinds of them; Disney, Nemo, Curious George, and let him put one on every finger if this simple luxury makes him feel all better. If only Adults were this easy to please..
2. Everything tastes better with cheese on it. If there is a meal you're making that you think your little one might balk at, load it up with the orange stuff. I find the ooeyer gooyer it is the more appeal it has, and the more fun it is to wrap around a fork and make long "string-shots" with.
3. Nothing is more frustrating then feeling like you have no options. Toddlers have so very little control in their everyday lives. Face it, parent's tell them when to go to bed, what to eat, how much to eat, what they can't touch, what they can't watch, and the list goes on. If he wants to wear faded red jogging pants that now look suspiciously close to a Strawberry Shortcake shade of pink, then let him. We as parent's really need to get over what other people think of us, and let them express themselves as they see fit, within reasonable perimeter's. They are their own unique individuals, they are different than us, and they are wonderful. So major on the major and minor on the minor's, and give them 3 or 4 options when available.
4. Electronic's are usually the least creative option. As our society continues to become more digital and rely on computer's for everything, it is quickly invading the classrooms and our child's lives. Where I do agree that sometimes it is necessary to let them watch t.v while your busy on the phone with the bank, or watch a dvd while your driving long distances, for the most part they're glorified babysitter's. Steve Jobs once said " Lincoln did not have a Web site at the log cabin where his parents home-schooled him, and he turned out pretty interesting. Historical precedent shows that we can turn out amazing human beings without technology. Precedent also shows that we can turn out very uninteresting human beings with technology". It's crazy that they now have tabletops that adjust to potty's so children can continue to "play" on their tablets. Let's get a grip people, what a money maker, going after the innocent because parent's can't get a handle on their own addictions to multimedia. Computer's however can be a great tool for learning, and open up a world of information and access, it just has to be used in moderation. A child can learn more by going out into their world and exploring, asking questions, and discovering. After all that's how most of us learned. I remember hours of playing manhunt with the neighbour kids, and social activities galore. Get em outside people and into arts, music and sports activities!!
5. There is rarely a time that they aren't watching you. Children are sponges, they absorb all the sights and sounds and info that is constantly being presented to them. We've learned this the hardway many times, like when our toddler yelled at car's going buy "stop splashing my Mom!!" when I'd yelled something similar just seconds earlier. Or repeating pieces of conversations that you and your Husband had that day, that you thought he was simply tuning out, only to find he repeats it at the most inopportune time. Oy! We are their models and this is both an overwhelming task at times, and also a great privledge and responsibility. Lord let me model the kind of person I want my child to become like.
6. They're voice and they're opinions count. So many times our son has grabbed something off the shelves while shopping and I say "Teo we don't need that only to look at it and realize we DO need it". They are so sharp and they keep an eye on the day to day just like we do. They recognize familiar products, landmarks, facial expressions, neigbour's, and so on. Their voice deserves to be heard, and often if we take the time to validate their points, we will find that they have great insight and fresh minds that haven't been tainted.
7. Dollar Store toys are great incentives. Ya sure they are cheap and often break within days, but boy the wonder and excitement of being able to pick out ANY toy, and sometimes just BECAUSE they co-operated and listened that day for the first time, all week.
8. Day trips are a great way to break up the monotony. My little guy loves to take the bus. Seems pretty uneventful to us, but to him it's a venture out into the adult world. And boy the questions that he comes up with. It teaches him about geography, travel, money, socializing, patience, and reaching a destination. We've also taken the train for a daytrip to a neighbouring city, which is also a great way to get around. Sometimes we go to the local tractor distributor or a petting zoo, or just to get icecream. You don't have to spend loads of money, to them it's all an adventure.
9. Cooking and baking is frustrating with a toddler, but do it anyways. They are very sensory in nature, and they love squishing things between their fingers, getting covered in flour, and watching their production come out of the oven. I remember many a time baking with my Mother, and they were always such happy memories. And such a great skill to have as an adult, especially for guys!
10. They will become functional and contributing adults to society one day. I always keep this one in the back of mind on a day-to-day basis. In the future he will have a wife and kids, and other people will have to work and interact with him. I would like him to be a man of honour, integrity, God fearing, loving, compassionate, faithful, and fair. So I better help to instill that in him while he's young and moldable.
These are but a few things that I've learned lately, as I continue to grow in this experience that has both changed me and grown me. And continues to challenge me in the greatest job of my life.
